Why your friends aren't supporting you?

Sulav Jung Hamal - Blog - 2023/08/12 -

Why your friends aren't supporting you?

Hey,

Support is very interesting. We feel like we need support from someone at every point to grow. We often find ourselves saying that people don't support me or people don't care about me or my paren't don't see what I've to go through. Or, they will never understand me. Why they don't understand me? If you ever felt that way, then let me take you to the root problem of it. Let me take you what is going on and why you feel the way you feel. But I want you to know that it is completely fine to feel that way.

1. They are busy.

Like you are busy creating your own success, they have their own life. You don't know as much about another person as you think you do. I had friends in my past whom I thought I knew everything about them. But I was wrong. I didn't know their family was going through a legal case in the court for the past 2 years and I had no sense about that. It is just this feeling that we think we know but the reality is something very different. They have their own set of problems like you have. They wake up everyday trying their best to do their best to achieve the success that you want as well. If you are not willing to take them with you, they will never show as much compassion or support for you as you wish them to. They are as busy dealing with their life.

2. No one is God.

I say this because no one can know what you are going through until you tell them. People often complain why their friends, parents, or relatives don't understand them. The problem could be you not telling them. How will they know? Tell them in clear and concise way what you need. Make sure that your demand is within their reach. Don't ask for too much as no one can afford to give you all and you shouldn't expect that either. But don't sit there complaining, people don't see my tiny gestures. No one is looking for tiny gestures and no one will be pleasing you every hour and every minute of the day.

3. They can't find happiness for other when they aren't happy.

Happiness is shared when a person is happy about themselves. That's why you hear people telling, the people richer than you will never dislike you for your success. Because they already are more successful and happy for themselves. If they were poor like you, it is harder for them to find the wisdom to be happy about other. It is just the human nature. We are competitive animals like every other animal. While saying that, I'm not implying that your friends are sad for your success. No, they are not. They don't have happiness to share within them. So, don't feel bad they didn't. Just understand that they aren't happy themselves. And make sure you let them be. But at the same time, don't push them away because they couldn't be happier for you.

4. Maybe you don't let them in your happiness.

I've seen a lot of people to wait for someone else to validate their success. In the hope of that, they wouldn't even share them. Eventually, they lose connection between each other. My suggestion: "Don't Wait". The moment you have something to share, don't hold yourself back just for the shake of it. Remind them that you've done something remarkable and they should congratulate you. Life is too short to keep tap on who does what first. So, try to include people in your happiness. When I say that, I mean for both success and failures. Don't wait for people to hear about your loss and to call you and be empathetic about it. That could never happen and you'll always wonder what went wrong.

Then:

The whole article came about from me asking the same question. Then, when I sat down and start typing, I realized their perspectives and my own. We are just here with different feelings and different moods. Sometimes, we do things because we want to. But in the rest, we don't do things just because we don't want to. There is no more than that. There is no intention behind most of the things that we do. People don't think about things that much anymore. We just exist with our mood and feelings. I'm glad that I sat down to write this blog today. I know a lot of people will see me posting this article and never click on the link to it. Will I be sad about that? No, I won’t. I will feel grateful to just know that they are there working in their life, trying to figure themselves out, and build their future. I'm rooting for you all friends.

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